What I know now

We all say, "If I knew then what I know now, I'd be...", which I used to think was a good thing, but after carefully considering the statement, I realize that for many; self included, we would have been done a major disservice.

We go through the good, bad, and indifferent in our lives for a reason.  Obviously many of us don't know what the reason is at the time, but after you've gotten through it, given yourself time to think, and then seen it with new eyes, you can say, "Okay, now I get it" instead of the opening statement.  Without our many and varied experiences, we wouldn't be who we are today.  We wouldn't know how to love, to heal, to grow, or simply just be.  While we want to erase the hurt, shield ourselves from the negatives, and live our respective utopia's; life simply doesn't go that way.  God wrote a book for each of us and it's stated in the Bible, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart..." Jeremiah 1:5.  God prepared our lives according to His will and it's preordained what will happen.  No, God did not want to hurt any of us, but sometimes those hurtful/painful things are a part of His plan to carve us and mold us; and even for us to reach out to Him and call for his anointing in order for Him to bless, strengthen and keep us.

We can't blame God when negative things happen.  Sometimes the intersection of our lives with another is what caused the situation to happen; especially when we ignore our gut and decide to do things our way.  Trust me, I've lived this very lesson.  The Shack by William P. Young speaks to this very matter and it's a book worth reading in order to understand love, loss, conflicted emotions, forgiveness and healing.  This book put so much of what I know now into perspective and softened a hardened part of me.  It gave me more clarity and showed me that bad things can happen for good reasons and it's not what happened to me that counts, it's what I did with what happened to me.

I think we all might be better served to accept the things we cannot change and to empower ourselves to accept and know what we know now as a blessing.  We are all victors and not victims if we allow ourselves to be.  Remember we can't undo the past and make it right and there are no do-overs, so we have to accept that what's done is done.  Let us remove the rose coloured glasses and stand tall and say, "What I know now is..." as it ties into your life and life story.  Be makers and doers of the world in order to make a difference.  Be the change you're looking for and accept the man/woman in the mirror; trusting, knowing, and believing that you are somebody.  Be defined for who you are now and not where/who you were. 

Stand tall and say, "I'm (insert name) and I am proud of me and I what I know now is..."

Make your life count!

Will we ever be satified????

Okay, answer me this, when will women ever be satisfied with their bodies/appearance?  I've got a serious case of "Sick-A-See" with all these products designed to make me "more beautiful".

From creams to take away wrinkles, smooth skin, fade marks, etc, etc; to pills/shakes/diets/foods, etc, etc, to make use loose weight; to all the endless ways to alter ourselves, I'm ready to annihilate a good portion of the cosmetics and food industry.  Yes, I'm no dummy, these products have been around for years, so that's not in fact what's got me all riled up.  It's actually these damn products to enhance eyelashes.  EYELASHES? REALLY???? I mean REALLY?????  How the heck has it gone that far that we're now so concerned with our eyelashes that we're resorting to pharmaceuticals to make them longer/fuller?  What the hell is wrong with mascara for chrissakes?   I know it's a cosmetic booster, but dammit, I'd rather see that in use than someone ingesting pills or adding some liquid chemical juice on their eyelids to make their lashes longer.  Ugh, I'm appalled and disgusted!  But further than that, I'm appalled and disgusted by those who created it and are peddling it in an effort to play on the insecurities of women.

Women, is it serious?  Have we become that shallow that we're worrying about eyelashes?  There are a million other REAL issues women could be worrying over than this.  Women need to stop being so freaking petty, insecure, and/or whatever it is that drives them to fall prey to the constant attack on their psyche.  Granted we all have something about ourselves that we're not to fond of, but there has to come a point in our lives where we just say, "eff it! I am who I am and that's all there is to it.  Love me or hate me, I am me".

Having suffered with self-esteem and body issues for many years of my life, I rejoiced when I finally accepted myself "as is".  I was never one too big on cosmetics, so I never fell victim to that attack, I did overly worry about my weight, but I had 20yrs, 1 month and 7 days of Uncle Sam to thank for that; however, at some point, I did kind of say, "eff you, I'm good" as my genes/DNA worked favourably for me.  And that ladies is my point.  We have to come to terms with who we are, how we're built, and what some of our pre-disposed factors are.  We're not all going to be what society likes to dictate we should be, so the best we can do if find a healthy comfortable weight/lifestyle and stick to it.  We have to stop being convinced that every part of us has a flaw and needs to be 'fixed'.

Ladies, if you haven't already, I suggest you start healing the wounded child within.  Find her and love her and let her be free.  Stop allowing yourself to be railroaded into thinking there is something wrong with you; be it your weight, your height, your breasts, or your freaking eyelashes.  Talk to your doctor and get a full checkup to ensure you're healthy for your height/weight and live with any meaningful changes you may have to make, but do it for all the RIGHT reasons and not because some money-grubbing a-hole says you're not beautiful.  We are ALL beautiful in our unique way and it's time we understood and accepted it.

Live according to YOU! 

I'm not embarassed to admit it...

After my wonderful trip to The Bahamas in July, I ended up with a Yeast Infection for being in the water and having my bathing suit on for many hours every day of the trip.  My GYN prescribed Diflucan, which is a pretty power Rx to heal from the inside out and supplemented it with another Rx for vaginal insertion.  The days past and I was 'cured'.  Well, that was until a month later when I got a nasty gash that resulted in 7 stitches and was given some pretty strong antibiotics to ward off infection; only to be rewarded with getting another Yeast Infection.  Needless to say, I was pretty pissed and ended up having to take yet another Rx in order to rid myself of the secondary infection. 

Sick and tired of Rx remedies and the expense of these treatments, I did some research to find more natural ways to rid a Yeast Infection.  There are many websites (too many to post), that through my research has collectively most of the same information on how to naturally treat a yeast infection and prevent recurrence.  Having ended up with one; YET AGAIN (my body hates me), I decided it was time to give it a try.

While it's my preference to treat myself naturally, I did think some of the treatment options a bit odd, but not odd enough to prevent me from trying them.  So, here's what I did.

A peeled; careful not to nick the surface clove of garlic inserted directly into the vagina.  The clove can stay in for up to 12hrs.  I did this during daytime hours (time I got up until 12hrs later). I know it sound nasty, but you don't even know it's there and now you don't smell like garlic from down under.

At night, I inserted plain yogurt (yes, it HAS to be plain) like Dannon into my vagina as a suppository.  Now, that got a little tricky as I had to find a needless syringe or small turkey baster to get the yogurt inserted. I was fortunate to have a small needless syringe used for child's medicine to do the deed.  You can also soak a tampon in yogurt, freeze it, and then insert it, but I opted out of that method.

After a few days of that combined routine, I completed my regimen with a douche made of equal parts of Tee Tree Oil and Rubbing Alcohol; 1 tsp each mixed in a sterile container.  I dumped the content of a store bought douche bottle and instead used about 5 drops of the mixture with distilled water. (The remaining mixture will sit quietly in your medicine counter in case it's needed another time.)

I checked myself a few days later and guess what????  It WORKED!  I can't tell you how happy this tried and proven remedy has made me.

Cost of traditional route vs. home remedy
TRADITIONAL
Trip to GYN 80 miles roundtrip (roughly $10 fuel) + $1.50 in tolls
$30 copay
$12 Rx
TOTAL = $52.50

HOME
16 miles roundtrip to health food store $3 fuel
$13.99  for 2oz Tee Tree Oil which has multiple uses
.50c for bottle of Alcohol, which also has multiple uses
$1.00 for two pack of generic douche (resuable bottles)
$1.09 for gallon distilled water multiple uses)
TOTAL = $19.58 in gas/products, but actual cost is hard to determine due to all products having multiple uses, but it's safe to say that's it cost more to drive to store and back because the actual mixture was less than a dollar.

So ladies, if you get a yeast infection and know for a fact it is one, feel free to try my method or you can research the this or many other natural options.  Don't be fooled by the OTC/Rx methods!

Stay healthy